I've spent the past couple days with my littlest man. I realize that no child beyond the first, will ever have the opportunity to have the quality time that he had, but we have our moments where we try with subsequent children. For me, as you know, I have lots of time that I need to catch up on with my littlest man. After all, unbeknownst to him, he went through a lot when I got a sick. He totally didn't get the benefits of breastfeeding the whole 15 months the first one did, he didn't get the time I put in, he didn't even get a quarter of the pictures that the first one had, or currently has....he just didn't get as much. And so, I have to admit, he stays in the bed longer with me, I baby him more, I indulge a bit more, to try and make up for it. And I'm sure he knows it. And I'm sure he takes advantage of it. And I let him. What can I say? He's my littlest guy and that's what I do.
The interesting thing will be what will happen when the new baby gets here. He will become the middle child. No insult meant towards middle children, but they are in a precarious spot in the family lineage. I don't want him to get lost in the shuffle, but can you see how that could happen? He's a pretty independent little guy so he doesn't really "need" help with things, so he won't necessarily ask or call attention to himself. It will be interesting. Definitely.
Friday, May 21, 2010
My oldest son has suffered with food allergies since he was a baby. Shortly after he was born, I had to alter my diet and get rid of the common allergens in my diet so that I could continue to breastfeed him. All regular formulas did nothing to help his situation. He ended up on presciption formula that I had to bid on eBay to get because the insurance company wouldn't cover the costs. He was on this for over a year. Bidding against other parents who had similar issues. It was intense. And that is without talking about the medicines for the reflux and other things. I'm grateful that he takes meds so well to this day because that's all he's known. Whereas the other one, yeah, that's a bit harder. Trust me, when I have to straddle him down just to shoot the thing in his mouth and for him to turn around and spit it back out....yeah, not so fun.
Anyway, whenever we go out, we have to explain the things that need to be done and avoided when we order for him. Yesterday was one of those days. I was too tired, too lazy to find something to cook. So we went out. I wanted to just go to Bob E*vans and make it simple. That didn't happen. We ended up trying someplace new. We ordered two kiddie hot dog meals with NO bun. She comes back and says they don't have any more hot dogs. I laugh on the inside and smirk thinking what kind of place is this? So we change the order to hamburgers, no bun, no cheese. She comes back with two hamburgers on buns. Well, when you do that, he can't have the hamburger because it's already touched the bread. We told her that. She comes back and says those were the last two hamburgers. No problem, we'll leave. Pay for the dinner that she put in front of me and go somewhere else.
He fell apart. All these years of having to explain and now someone telling him he couldn't eat because of his allergies just tore him apart. He was balling. I felt so bad... He thought it was his fault, that he had allergies. How many times have I had to try and disspell that thought only to be foiled by this woman who was an insensitive idiot (I'm trying to stay g-rated here).
I have tried, many times, to ensure that my child knows that his allergies are not his fault. But I KNOW how very frustrating it is for him whenever we are out that there isn't always going to be something he can eat. Hell, it's frustrating for me to always have to think ahead and sometimes I don't do that. So for him, it sucks royally. I want for him to outgrow it, I really do, but I know that takes time. And during that time, I, as his mother, really need to step up to the plate more. I'm slacking and wallowing in my own misery lately. And that's not fair to him.
He's the most compassionate and caring little person I know. He's a wonderful big brother and son and I want the world to be at his beck and call. Uggg, I'm a sopping mess now. Frustration and love, two different emotions evoked by the same thing. That's being a mother, I guess. (((SIGH)))
Anyway, whenever we go out, we have to explain the things that need to be done and avoided when we order for him. Yesterday was one of those days. I was too tired, too lazy to find something to cook. So we went out. I wanted to just go to Bob E*vans and make it simple. That didn't happen. We ended up trying someplace new. We ordered two kiddie hot dog meals with NO bun. She comes back and says they don't have any more hot dogs. I laugh on the inside and smirk thinking what kind of place is this? So we change the order to hamburgers, no bun, no cheese. She comes back with two hamburgers on buns. Well, when you do that, he can't have the hamburger because it's already touched the bread. We told her that. She comes back and says those were the last two hamburgers. No problem, we'll leave. Pay for the dinner that she put in front of me and go somewhere else.
He fell apart. All these years of having to explain and now someone telling him he couldn't eat because of his allergies just tore him apart. He was balling. I felt so bad... He thought it was his fault, that he had allergies. How many times have I had to try and disspell that thought only to be foiled by this woman who was an insensitive idiot (I'm trying to stay g-rated here).
I have tried, many times, to ensure that my child knows that his allergies are not his fault. But I KNOW how very frustrating it is for him whenever we are out that there isn't always going to be something he can eat. Hell, it's frustrating for me to always have to think ahead and sometimes I don't do that. So for him, it sucks royally. I want for him to outgrow it, I really do, but I know that takes time. And during that time, I, as his mother, really need to step up to the plate more. I'm slacking and wallowing in my own misery lately. And that's not fair to him.
He's the most compassionate and caring little person I know. He's a wonderful big brother and son and I want the world to be at his beck and call. Uggg, I'm a sopping mess now. Frustration and love, two different emotions evoked by the same thing. That's being a mother, I guess. (((SIGH)))
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
I feel I am lucky enough that every year, I find a poem that speaks to how I feel as a mother. As Mother's Day approaches, I am grateful for having the opportunity to be one to not just one little person, but two and a third on the way. And that doesn't count my godchildren, nieces and nephews, and just little people of big people I care about. :)
Happy Mommy's Day to all my gurlzzzzzzzzzz!! :)
MOTHERS
Real Mothers don't eat quiche;
They don’t have time to make it.
Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils
Are probably in the sandbox.
Real Mothers often have sticky floors,
Filthy ovens and happy kids.
Real Mothers know that dried play dough
Doesn't come out of carpets.
Real Mothers don't want to know what
The vacuum just sucked up...
Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?'
And get their answer when a little
Voice says, 'Because I love you best.'
Real Mothers know that a child’s growth
Is not measured by height or years or grade...
It is marked by the progression of Mommy to
Mom to Mother.....
The Images of Mother
4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mommy can do anything!
8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't know everything!
14 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother? She wouldn't have a clue.
16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's so five minutes ago
18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!
25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it!
35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.
45 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
65 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mom.
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul
It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows,
And the beauty of a woman with passing years only grows!
Happy Mommy's Day to all my gurlzzzzzzzzzz!! :)
MOTHERS
Real Mothers don't eat quiche;
They don’t have time to make it.
Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils
Are probably in the sandbox.
Real Mothers often have sticky floors,
Filthy ovens and happy kids.
Real Mothers know that dried play dough
Doesn't come out of carpets.
Real Mothers don't want to know what
The vacuum just sucked up...
Real Mothers sometimes ask 'Why me?'
And get their answer when a little
Voice says, 'Because I love you best.'
Real Mothers know that a child’s growth
Is not measured by height or years or grade...
It is marked by the progression of Mommy to
Mom to Mother.....
The Images of Mother
4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mommy can do anything!
8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't know everything!
14 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother? She wouldn't have a clue.
16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's so five minutes ago
18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!
25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it!
35 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.
45 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
65 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mom.
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul
It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows,
And the beauty of a woman with passing years only grows!
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